by Anonymous Survivor | Nov 3, 2023 | Domestic Violence, Leaving
On October 31 last year, I left my husband, the area I’d lived in for over 30 years, and headed for a new life in another state. This was the culmination of 10 years of a very unhealthy and frequently verbally and emotionally abusive marriage. It is probably the...
by Anonymous Survivor | Nov 3, 2023 | Domestic Violence
Breaking free isn’t the hardest part – well, at least it wasn’t for me. It was hard to leave my husband all alone, to leave my friends, to leave many sentimental belongings behind. But the part that’s really hard is choosing freedom. It was weeks – actually, probably...
by Eileen Gorski | Oct 4, 2023 | Domestic Violence
Over the next few weeks, I would like to discuss the phases of domestic violence. The first phase is known as the Honeymoon Phase. This phase takes from the old adage “the honeymoon is as good as it gets.” Picture the early stages of a relationship. The couple is...
by Eileen Gorski | Oct 4, 2023 | Domestic Violence
In Phase Two, the tensions begin to build. Often, some outside stressor begins to cause strife in the relationship. Maybe they’re having trouble at work, money is tight, or someone is dealing with physical health issues. An obvious tension begins to linger in the room...
by Eileen Gorski | Oct 4, 2023 | Domestic Violence
In Phase Three, the simmering tensions reach their boiling point. The abuser, feeling they have the upper hand, begins to escalate their behaviors to a new level. More name-calling, public and private humiliation, controlling the victim’s actions, destroying property,...
by Eileen Gorski | Oct 4, 2023 | Domestic Violence
The final phase, the Leaving Phase, seeks to break the continuing cycle of abuse. This can often be when the victim is at their most anxious. They may worry in the lead up about the repercussions of being caught or by the prospect of upsetting their abuser. Stopping...
