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Love

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Who is that person that you are living with?

1. Can you count on your partner to be the same at home as they are in public?
2. Do they treat you the same as if it was just the two of you in the room?
3. Does this sound like both of you? Be kind one to another
4. Can you be open and honest with your lover or do you feel like you are walking on eggshells whenever you have a conversation.

Love is not one-sided. We need to do our part and make sure we are walking and acting the way God expects us to. There isn’t an excuse for either party to not treat another human being with respect.

But God does not want you to be disrespected, put down, belittled, abused physically, mentally, emotionally or any other way. God does not want you to stay with your partner if you are being abused.

Love doesn’t mean that you do not say you’re sorry if you are. But it doesn’t mean that you say you’re sorry and make excuses for your partner. Love does mean you are loved by God. Love is more than expensive dinners, flowers, candy, pampering you. Love is respect, honor, listening to you when you need to be heard.

Honor God

Isaiah 41:10
New International Version
10 So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

The Hurricane of Domestic Violence – 4 (2020)

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the hurricane of domestic violenceRemember Me

How many of you remember the name of a hurricane that you or someone you know was in? That name is distasteful in your mouth for that name. If someone says the name Camille, Helena, Andrew to you, what do you think about? You remember those names?

If three women are killed daily in the United States due to domestic violence, will you remember these names? All these names are victims of domestic violence that were killed by the hurricane that was in their lives — the abuser.
Chandra May – age 29
Linda Pa Vue – age 29
Leticia Vela – age 25
Francisa Ramirez – age 38
Lisbet Mendez – age 24
Stacy Locknath – age 26
Stephanie Killeen – age 46
Gretchen Rust – age 64
Tracy Reedy – age 50
Theresa Watts – age 36

We do not want your name to be added to this list. Each of these ladies continued to think that it wouldn’t happen to them. That as a hurricane comes in waves that the storms of this time in their lives would pass again.

Have you told anyone about the hurricanes in your life with your abuser? May I plead with you to tell someone? Let someone know what is going on in your life.

Prepare for the hurricane of your life. Check back at the blogs from Reach Out Speak Out. Check back at the Facebook posts that give you a list of the things you need to do to prepare for the hurricane of domestic violence.
Now is hurricane season. Now is the time for you to prepare for your personal hurricane.

We do not want to add your name to the list above. We do not want you to think that this pattern is going to go away. Protect yourself and your children. You as the abused person have a responsibility to you and your children.
Reach Out Speak Out is here to help you navigate through this hurricane in your life.

We are a non-profit ministry and our focus is on those that are in our faith based community that are in a domestic violence relationship. 501(C)(3)47-1630804 Thank you in advance.

Remember, your time, talent and money can and will save someone’s life.

*To read additional information about the author of this blog, you may be interested in her book called, “It Started With A Hamburger”. It can be downloaded from Amazon.com All royalties go to Reach Out Speak Out.

In August, you will hear from a man who was a domestic violence victim as a child tells his story.

The Hurricane of Domestic Violence – Part 1 (2020)

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the hurricane of domestic violenceAs hurricane season gets fully under way, it seems an appropriate time to visit the hurricane emergency checklists. These checklists are also an excellent tool in preparing to leave a domestic violence situation.

The meteorologists give names to hurricanes. If you live in an area that gets hurricanes, you know there are specific things that must be done to prepare yourself, your family and your belongings.

There are warnings from all media outlets, grocery stores prepare to have the things you need to survive. Home improvement stores keep the stores stocked with things to keep you safe.

Have you ever been in the middle of a hurricane? Some of you have received many many warnings to prepare and to leave your home so that you can be safe.

It takes time to prepare to leave. If you wait till the last moment, or are in a hurry, there
will be situations and things that will be lost. Hopefully this doesn’t include life.

How many of you would consider staying in your home when you have been warned that
you need to leave to be safe? How many of you would know and understand that there are
serious dangers but you just stay in your home and take a chance that somehow, someway
you will be spared from danger or even loss of life?

Wouldn’t you prepare? How about the hurricanes that is in your life? Specifically, the
hurricanes that are happening “inside” your home? The hurricane I am talking about is called
domestic violence.

How does your logic measure up to staying vs. your logic to stay even though you will be in
the path of a hurricane?

Do you see the similarity? Did you know you can prepare to leave safely from a domestic
violence relationship in the same way? You can use the guidelines. What if the authorities
came to your home and drove down your street with a loud siren and microphone warning
you to leave. How long would it take you to leave? Why? Are you waiting to leave your
domestic violence relationship?

Let’s get ready for the hurricane of domestic violence in your home. One in three women
is in a domestic violence relationship. If not you — it is your neighbor, friend, relative, co-
worker or that person in your church at the end of your row.

List of things to get together when you prepare to leave safely because of a hurricane/domestic violence:

1.   Birth Certificates for all family members
2.   Social Security cards/numbers
3.   Prescriptions (make sure they are full)
4.   Doctors contact information
5.   Oil Change for vehicles
6.   Tires in good condition
7.   Full tank of gas in your car
8.   Extra gas can
9.   Brakes/belts/hoses
10. Car phone charger
11. All bank account numbers and information
12. Line of Credit /loan information
13. Mortgage/rental agreements
14. CASH (if electric is out a credit card cannot be used)
15. Credit card/debit information
16. Any contracts/agreement papers
17. Write down all email addresses
18. Write down all contact information
19. Write down all sign in and passwords
20. Write down your electronic address book
(Internet may not be available to you. You need a hard copy.)
21. Remember vitamins/supplements
22. Passport/Visa/Green Card
23. Write it down!!!Emergency phone/contact numbers
24. Electronic devices powered up just in case you can use them
25. Insurance policies
26. Make an extra set of keys to EVERYTHING
27. REMEMBER ALL EMERGENCY CONTACT INFORMATION
28. List of utility companies with your account # & contact info
29. List of contacts from your work related people
30. Download everything to a thumb drive or other devise for
safe keeping and to have an extra copy
31. Have your children pick out a few of their favorite things
and make sure you take them with you
32. Batteries for all those gaming devices
33. Your favorite clothing/shoes
34. Photo albums (Now is the time to download them to an
auxiliary device.)
35. Our pets are a member of our family. They should get the
same care and preparedness as your two legged children.
36. Shot Records
37. Vet contact information
38. A place that you can be with them at a shelter or home
39. Food / treats
40. Medications
41. Cage or carrying case
42. Flashlight
43. Whistle
44. First Aid Kit
45. Crank Radio (NOAA Weather Radio)
46. Maps
47. Your daily health and beauty items
48. Water
49. Gatorade or hydration drinks
50. Canned foods
51. Hand held can opener
52. Matches
53. A book/puzzles
*To read additional information about the author of this blog, you may be interested in her book called, “It
Started With A Hamburger”. It can be downloaded from Amazon.com All royalties go to Reach Out Speak
Out.

BE The Change in 2020 Week 3

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We Can Be Heroes For Just One Day - David Bowie

“Be the change that you wish to see in the world.” Mahatma Gandhi

     You don’t have to understand or know what to do if you think someone is in a domestic violence relationship. 

     How can you help?

  • Know the warning signs
  • Give the person you think may be in a domestic violence relationship the palm card with the warning signs
  • Smile at them and show yourself friendly and with an open heart
  • Invite them to church or a church activity
  • Buy them a meal or a cup of coffee to sit and listen to them. 
  • Have a kind and gentle spirit
  • Appreciate them – find something to encourage them about
  • Be available
  • Believe that you can make a difference in someone’s life — because you are
  • Have faith and pray for them

    BE THE CHANGE IN 2020

    How can you be the change in this world in 2020?   Start with yourself.

  • Start with yourself and evaluate yourself first and then your partner, friends, loved ones, co-workers.  But start with you. 
  • Share your life experiences with someone that is traveling the same road that you have been on before.

    I believe that God does not allow us to go through anything except to learn and to help someone else.  He has trusted us with this experience.  And if we do not help someone else in the same situation, we are wasting these precious moments of lessons and learning.  And, we will also miss the blessing of seeing you able to encourage and walk through a valley with someone else.

    First help yourself to be where God wants you to be.  Then, be available for those that need you in their lives.

James 4:8  (ESV)

8 Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded.

 

Make 2020 the year that will be free of domestic violence!

ReachOutSpeakOut.org 

[email protected]

501(3)(C) 47-1630804

SUCCESS

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S U C C E S S. Thanks to each of you that came out to support our 4th Annual Purple Passion Silent Auction. Another year that we will be able to help victims of domestic violence become survivors. If you would like information about Reach Out Speak Out, you can check out our website ReachOutSpeakOut.org or email us at [email protected] or message us on the Facebook page 💜💜💜💜💜💜

The Hurricane Of Domestic Violence

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the hurricane of domestic violenceThe meteorologists give names to hurricanes. If you live in an area that gets hurricanes, you know there are specific things that must be done to prepare yourself, your family and your belongings.

There are warnings from all media outlets, grocery stores prepare to have the things you need to survive. Home improvement stores keep the stores stocked with things to keep you safe.

Have you ever been in the middle of a hurricane? Some of you have received many many warnings to prepare and to leave your home so that you can be safe.

It takes time to prepare to leave. If you wait till the last moment, or are in a hurry, there
will be situations and things that will be lost. Hopefully this doesn’t include life.

How many of you would consider staying in your home when you have been warned that
you need to leave to be safe? How many of you would know and understand that there are
serious dangers but you just stay in your home and take a chance that somehow, someway
you will be spared from danger or even loss of life?

Wouldn’t you prepare? How about the hurricanes that is in your life? Specifically, the
hurricanes that are happening “inside” your home? The hurricane I am talking about is called
domestic violence.

How does your logic measure up to staying vs. your logic to stay even though you will be in
the path of a hurricane?

Do you see the similarity? Did you know you can prepare to leave safely from a domestic
violence relationship in the same way? You can use the guidelines. What if the authorities
came to your home and drove down your street with a loud siren and microphone warning
you to leave. How long would it take you to leave? Why? Are you waiting to leave your
domestic violence relationship?

Let’s get ready for the hurricane of domestic violence in your home. One in three women
is in a domestic violence relationship. If not you — it is your neighbor, friend, relative, co-
worker or that person in your church at the end of your row.

List of things to get together when you prepare to leave safely because of a hurricane/domestic violence:

1.   Birth Certificates for all family members
2.   Social Security cards/numbers
3.   Prescriptions (make sure they are full)
4.   Doctors contact information
5.   Oil Change for vehicles
6.   Tires in good condition
7.   Full tank of gas in your car
8.   Extra gas can
9.   Brakes/belts/hoses
10. Car phone charger
11. All bank account numbers and information
12. Line of Credit /loan information
13. Mortgage/rental agreements
14. CASH (if electric is out a credit card cannot be used)
15. Credit card/debit information
16. Any contracts/agreement papers
17. Write down all email addresses
18. Write down all contact information
19. Write down all sign in and passwords
20. Write down your electronic address book
(Internet may not be available to you. You need a hard copy.)
21. Remember vitamins/supplements
22. Passport/Visa/Green Card
23. Write it down!!!Emergency phone/contact numbers
24. Electronic devices powered up just in case you can use them
25. Insurance policies
26. Make an extra set of keys to EVERYTHING
27. REMEMBER ALL EMERGENCY CONTACT INFORMATION
28. List of utility companies with your account # & contact info
29. List of contacts from your work related people
30. Download everything to a thumb drive or other devise for
safe keeping and to have an extra copy
31. Have your children pick out a few of their favorite things
and make sure you take them with you
32. Batteries for all those gaming devices
33. Your favorite clothing/shoes
34. Photo albums (Now is the time to download them to an
auxiliary device.)
35. Our pets are a member of our family. They should get the
same care and preparedness as your two legged children.
36. Shot Records
37. Vet contact information
38. A place that you can be with them at a shelter or home
39. Food / treats
40. Medications
41. Cage or carrying case
42. Flashlight
43. Whistle
44. First Aid Kit
45. Crank Radio (NOAA Weather Radio)
46. Maps
47. Your daily health and beauty items
48. Water
49. Gatorade or hydration drinks
50. Canned foods
51. Hand held can opener
52. Matches
53. A book/puzzles
*To read additional information about the author of this blog, you may be interested in her book called, “It
Started With A Hamburger”. It can be downloaded from Amazon.com All royalties go to Reach Out Speak
Out.

Love Shouldn’t Hurt

by

For florists it’s one of the biggest money-making days along with Mother’s Day and the December holidays. For candy makers it means millions of dollars, even during a recession.

For the wives and children who are victims of violence and abuse, Valentine’s Day is just another day of fear, dread, and anxiety.

Many women (and some men too) are hurt by the same people who once promised to love, cherish and protect them.  When this happens, the fear of abuse and even death can be overwhelming.

Love Shouldn't HurtThis Valentine’s Day whether you are in a happy, loving, committed relationship or you are one of the many people who will be celebrating “Singles Awareness Day,” one of the things that you may be thankful for is a brief reprieve from domestic violence. 

Although there is some evidence that Valentine’s Day is connected to a spike in domestic abuse, according to the National Resource Center on Domestic Violence, Valentine’s Day is actually one of three days where there is actually a slight decrease in reports of domestic violence (the other two are Thanksgiving and Christmas). 

This is a tiny bright spot within a very dark issue that usually only comes to light when a celebrity has been caught on tape abusing their partner or because someone who you have never heard of has been killed after years of abuse.

Sadly, domestic violence is overwhelmingly common in the United States. Twenty people are physically abused by their partners every minute. Nearly 5 million women are victims of physical abuse by their partners every year and over 38 million women in the United States have experienced physical intimate partner violence in their lifetimes. 

Unfortunately, there are some for whom Valentine’s Day is not a happy day at all.

Here’s hoping that you have a great Valentine’s Day full of love and affection with your friends, family and significant others.

Faith-Based Help

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Reach Out Speak Out A Domestic Violence Support GroupReach Out Speak Out is a faith-based non-profit dealing with families in domestic violence situations. Statistics show that 1 in 4 women and 1 in 7 men are in some type of DV. That means that someone you know, could be your neighbor, co-worker, family member, or friend is involved in some type of domestic violence situation.

Reach Out Speak Out‘s mission is to help women in need of assistance due to domestic violence; to provide shelter, food, clothing, and the necessities of life; to provide information through books and counseling; to enlist the help of other professionals with domestic violence experience; to speak at faith-based organizations and other community meetings regarding the warning signs of domestic violence.

Reach Out Speak Out has been a nonprofit ministry since 2013. Every member of the Board of Directors and Advisory Board has either worked with domestic violence victims and organizations or was a victim in their own life. Reach Out Speak Out is structured to help the women within our faith-based community and church. Although there are many organizations that help and shelter women and men affected by DV, there is a very small percentage of organizations that help specifically in this area. Since this particular group of women seems to stick with an abuser longer because of their faith, Reach Out Speak Out will educate them from a Biblical perspective. We will not use the “world’s” view on the subject. Although those views are very acceptable, the person we are talking about has been surrounded with a different guideline of living.

We welcome the opportunity to speak to your business or community organization to help get them involved in our mission. We always accept donations of non-perishable food items, cleaning supplies, toiletries and paper products as well as gift cards for groceries and gasoline.

You can check out Reach Out Speak Out at ReachOutSpeakOut.org (501(3)(C) 47-1630804 and follow us on Facebook at https://www.facebook.com/reachoutspeakout.

Elizabeth Sullivan, Chair-Elect

Reach Out Speak Out

Cell: 813-985-1970

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